Fiendish Friday: Bastion of Fear

I had to make yet another visit to the bastion of fear today. The place of humiliation and sheer terror. Where you are guaranteed to get lost and nothing makes sense. I speak of hell on earth….Home Depot.

Yes, that’s right I entered the lion’s den. I’ve going there a lot lately as we are working on the house. And somehow my husband always talks me into going and getting all the parts we need. I usually manage to avoid conversing with the employees. I just spend the 6 hours necessary to find the random item I need. But today I was sick and just wanted to buy the 6 things I needed and go home to bed. And there was my mistake. I tried to talk to one of the employees.

So I wander into the third electrical section looking for a new dimmer electrical workings. I ask the woman in the aisle for help as I am totally confused by all the crap. She of course doesn’t work in that section but comes back with a guy who does. In between his distracted conversation with another employee and his ringing phone I attempt to explain my dimmer switch has burned out and I need to replace the guts. He says, “I can’t sell you the guts of a dimmer switch.”

“Ok, then what would you do to fix a burned out dimmer switch?” I smile in what I hope is a bewitching manner.

“You can’t fix it.”

deep breathe. “What can you do?”

“You have to replace it.”

I grind my teeth and smile wider. “With what?”

And then he hands me the electrical guts to a dimmer switch.

And I thank him kindly, omitting all the swear words that came to mind.


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