Day 28: Forgive someone and look for their good points

 

Ever heard the phrase holding a grudge is like swallowing poison and expecting the other person to die?

I try really hard to remember that, so I don’t hold onto that sort of cruddle. It can be struggle, of course. I find venting it really well, usually let’s me let it go. By which I mean complaining in detail to a girlfriend over wine.

But just because I forgive someone doesn’t mean they should get another chance to mess with my life. Protecting oneself is not the same as not forgiving someone.

I would argue that the greatest challenge to forgiveness is when the repercussions are still making waves in your life from something someone else did. I’ll give an example.

A parent at the coop set up relationships with vendors a few years back. And when the board tried to change or cancel those relationships, this parent fought us, and because this parent had set up the relationship, the vendors ignored the board. We refused to sign contracts with vendors and they came anyway on this parent’s say so, without a contract. We had to get legal involved. And then we had to pay for services we hadn’t agreed to, that we hadn’t signed contracts for, to the amount that legal arbitrated with the vendors. Money the coop didn’t have. Money that gave the coop a fat deficit in the budget. Now the coop is being audited.

It’s very hard to forgive this person when their actions are still jacking with my life on a daily basis. I’m working on it. I am. But mostly I think it’s a good thing this parent no longer attends the coop because I think my head might explode if I had to look at them twice a week. LOL

If you don’t know what I am talking about with the whole Kindness Challenge, you can find the calendar here. All normal posts will resume in January. Enjoy the time off. Enjoy the kindness. Practice a little yourself.