Hello my darlings,

It’s been not much writing lately and a lot of writing business. I’m trying to fine tune my back of the book verbiage for The Body in the Pool.

Maybe you’d like to help me with that?

Option A:

Seattle has seen it’s fair share of serial killers, but this time a new demographic needs to watch their backs…successful white males are losing their lives in shockingly public venues.

Detective Spencer Thomas and his task force are 12 murders deep and no closer to finding the Dismember Killer than they were when the first body appeared. The killer is taunting them without leaving in any useful evidence.

With a pregnant wife on bed rest, brass that strips his resources, and the FBI breathing down his neck…the last thing Spence needs is a dead body at an exclusive boarding school. Except now, he’s got one…

 

Option B:

Whispering Evergreen Academy, boarding school to the troubled elite, just got the worst kind of floater dumped in their pool; a dead one. Another successful white male, left in a public place, is this the 12th body dropped by the Dismember Killer?

Detective Spencer Thomas and his task force hope this time the serial killer has left some evidence they can use.  They’ve come up empty so far – no physical evidence, no witnesses, and no surveillance. Will this body be any different?

 

What do you think? What direction would you go? What would you change? Help me finally finish this blurb so I can publish the darn book.