Friday Fun

So I’ve decided to update you all about my spy novel on Friday and call it Friday Fun in the hopes that repeating Fun will leak into my brain and make me think writing on my spy novel is fun again. I know it’s a crazy thought process, but I’m a writer, crazy is where I’m at. LOL.

So this week I wrote only 212 words on my spy novel, which puts me like 6000 words behind. I know I have the rest of the day to write on my novel but I have doubts that I will get much more done today. The dog still needs to be walked. I need to go to Costco. And we have a play date this afternoon. So in light of this I have bit the bullet and signed up for Camp Nanowrimo starting July 1st. I have set my goal at 15000 words, which will put me back on track for my 2K a week goal and catch me up for all the weeks I am behind. Hopefully that momentum will carry through August and September and I can wrap up in time to prep for Nano proper this year. Here’s hoping for a good cabin.

So last night I sat down and played with the color on the pic everyone else likes.

IMG_2710 (3)

What do you think? Better in color play? or Black and White?

Wednesday Writer’s Cafe

I bailed.

I know, I know. I never miss unless something major has gone down. But really I didn’t get anywhere near enough sleep the night before and when I tried to grab a nap my kiddo was incapable of letting me. Plus I didn’t have a sitter. And the other mom who brings her kids to write in (they play with mine super well), told me they weren’t coming. AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Does that qualify as major?

It did to me.

So I stayed home. I didn’t even write. I didn’t even write my bog post for Wednesday. I watched documentaries and painted. I needed that break though, let me tell you. Yesterday felt almost as long as the drive back from Park City, Utah, which I did in one day, all 850 odd miles of it, with my kiddo.

So onto the photo situation. I promised you a reveal this week and I will.

The problem is…..

Everyone seems to like one photo and I really like another. I posted the photos to facebook because I wasn’t getting enough meaningful feedback here. And I got a full slew of friends who swear this is the best photo ever.

Image One
Most voted for.

I like it. I do. It needs some photo shopping, like the shadow and lines on my neck.

But personally, I feel pulled to this one.

IMG_2612 (2)

Yes, it needs the shine fixed on my lip gloss. I’m thinking about maybe bringing it up from black and white to a tonal shot, not full color but playful. It could be interesting given how much of my hair is on display and is blue and green.

Sigh, what’s an author to do. Tell me, please?

Wednesday Writer’s Cafe – Special Edition

Good morning Internet! Welcome to my usual Thursday morning post about the writing I didn’t get done at the Wednesday night Writer’s Cafe, with a twist. I only got about 350 words written last night. That spy novel is just dragging on me. I like the characters, I do. But the plot is just wearing me out. sigh.

Ok, on to more fun things. I need to pick an author photo. And marketing photos. And maybe a new shot for my blog. My cohorts at the Cafe helped me narrow it down to six. You, yes, you, get to have an opinion too.

Quick Disclaimer: This is not the way I wanted to do this but after three hours of wrestling with the limitations of WordPress, my laptop, and my software, this was what I needed to go with before my kiddo self destructed.


Image One: Am I pushing you away or being arty? You decide.

Image Two: I’m too distant they say. Hello, I’m writing under a pseudonym. I like distance.

Image Three: Yes, my lips are too shiny. I’ll have it edited if it gets picked.

Image Four: We had so much fun with this picture. S and V thought this was the quintessential me. I don’t know about all that.

Image Five: This was debated. Heartily. So, some thought it was too blurry. Others thought it was arty. What say you?

Image Six: More debate. It’s not very authory. Like I care. LOL. Do you?

Vote in the comments. Tell me what you like. What you hate. Or just post a number. I’m easy and I’ll wait on posting my decision until next Wednesday’s Writer’s Cafe update. You have time, but not too much, don’t dally.

Brilliant Read

I just read an amusing and insightful little number on Long Reads this morning. You can find the whole article here

Let me sum it up for you though….

Man leaves the internet, his cell phone, and almost all human contact behind to spend a week in a shack, no running water, no power, in the Scottish highlands. He finds himself on the edge of madness before he manages to embrace himself as a person worth knowing and spending time with.

I loved it. But then again for the most part, I love time without people. It was my birthday last weekend and people keep asking what did you do. I smile and tell them my husband took my son to the pool for several hours both days. This confuses people. But for me 3 hours of time all alone….magic. Two days in a row? Miracle.

My favorite line from the article is this one,  “or else, in moments when dystopian visions of us slowly morphing into robots feel horribly prescient, staring dumbly at a screen trying to remember whether I had any reason to look at it other than to bask for a moment in its warm, comforting glow.” I could relate to this. I find myself checking my wordpress stats page several times a day to see if anyone read me, liked me, or commented. It doubles if I’ve asked questions.

Tomorrow I will be posting 6 possible author photos for my book. You get to vote. So why not practice the art of opinion now and tell me if you’ve ever gone without internet or cell phone for a period of time and how you coped or reveled in the experience.

Just smile

so I spent a good part of this weekend struggling to take author photos. Yes, that may sound ridiculous, and I guess maybe it is but it is also the reality of who I am. I do not like to be looked at. I do not like the way I look. I am most comfortable, when I am invisible physically, and can be just me.

The very act of taking an author photo defies all of the emotions I just attempted to explain. And because I am female there is an inherent suggestion that I should be beautiful. And I am not. And I am aware of that constantly. In fact when anyone tries to suggest I am attractive in any way, there is this huge rift in my time space continuum because my brain refuses the suggestion. It’s like those mystery spots where things roll up hill and you know it can’t really be defying the laws of physics so your brain struggles and you get dizzy? That’s kind of what happens to me when someone says I have beautiful eyes or whatever.

This whole thing has actually been a three step process. First pictures with me doing my own make up. Picture hearty laughter from the photographer. Then after she and her assistant had hit me with half the contents of Mac and again with something in the middle. Each time paring down the poses. Paring down the clothes that photograph well.

Each time forcing me to smile or not smile, suck it in, let it out, show some cleavage, cover it up, toes pointed, toes relaxed, shows on, shoes off, pretend, pretend, pretend…

I am exhausted.