I’ve been thinking Thursday: False Imprisonment

I am steaming mad right now. I was just falsely imprisoned.


False imprisonment occurs when a person is restricted in their personal movement within any area without justification or consent. Actual physical restraint is not necessary for false imprisonment to occur.


So I go to pick the kid up from a local park program. On my way in I see they are setting up for a cross country thing. Ok, whatevs.

I pick up the kid and start driving along the single road that gets you out of the park. The only exit.

Where I am stopped by some guy in a large group of people who informs me that the kids are running so I can’t drive.

I remind him they aren’t supposed to be running on the road.

“Oh but they need to cross it, twice. You’ll have to wait until the race is over.”

WTF? This long line of cars, now, has to wait several hours for your cross country meet to be over because runners who are no where in sight have to cross the road at some point, twice?

I just about lost my shit. I should have called the police, false imprisonment being a felony and all, but instead I got a parks employee who reminded said jerk that the cross country race contract specifically prohibited them from stopping cars on the road unless there were actual runners in sight.

Again I ask WTF?

Is humanity so single mindedly focused on their own desires they have lost the ability to act like a human?

I was pondering this on the drive home as I watched 6 or 7 cars refuse to a let a car in that had turned onto the road and was stuck in the suicide lane.

And yes, I let the guy in. He waved thank you.

No need to thank me man, just a flipping human over here.

Fiendish Friday: Constraints

I think of you often. Yes, you, all of you. I’ll be reading a book or driving about and something will cross my mind and I think I should totally post about that, readers would find it funny.

But then the constraining naysayer kicks in. Maybe you shouldn’t tell them that. What if someone reads that posts and misconstrues it? Gulp. What if that friend who never reads your blog picks today to read it? Gulp. What if that funny little post unleashes a shit storm? Gulp.

That’s me swallowing all the things I decide not to say. I do it in real life too. Say only that which is kind and helpful. Swallow down that which is cranky, snippy, or dismissive, that which might hurt.

But sometimes I have the mad urge to just say all the things I never say.

“hey mother fucker don’t flip me off in front of my kid because you decided to break the law and I almost hit you.”

“Don’t you have anything more important to do than spend all day bitching about politics on Facebook. Go out and and make actual change in the world.”

“I don’t care what you think about how we are running the coop; you would never take any real responsibility while you were here, caused nothing but issues with vendors, and then you left to put your daughter in private school. Don’t call and explain how much we are ruining everything.”

Actually I see a trend here. The one I really want to shout, every time I turn around,


Next week a feel good rant, I promise. Or at least one that will make you laugh.


Fiendish Friday: To you

Yes, you. The lovely soccer mom driving the monster Escalade through a crowded Saturday afternoon parking lot with her face glued to her cell phone. I know you didn’t see me, hello all you saw was your cell phone. But that was me, jumping back to keep from getting run over by you. I have just one thing to say to you….

Please tell me you were looking at pictures of a naked Chris Pine from Wonder Woman.

I hate to think┬ámy life is only worth a boring old text telling you not to forget the milk….

Fiendish Friday: The crack

I was mistakenly cruising my home “news” page on facebook. It was a fairly low politics day so I got to check out people’s plans for the weekend and what their cute kids had broken now…then I came across this video. Of a construction guy putting plaster into another man’s pants because his crack was showing.

The crack guy gets really mad and starts yelling at the plaster guy.

All of the comments on the video were about how it served crack guy right and he shouldn’t get so mad.

WTF? When did assault become funny and the victim’s fault? I’m kind of horrified by man kind right now…

Fiendish Friday: People Suck

All the things that have happened lately have just deflated my Pollyanna bubble. Call me ridiculous or naive but I honestly believed people did the best they could. That people were, for the most part, good and decent. But my Pollyanna glasses have been shattered. They weren’t quite rose colored, I wasn’t that full of the faith of mankind, but they had a faint pink tint until lately.

Yes, I know bad things happen all the time on a global scale. But I guess I always felt like you and me, in our day to day life, we weren’t out to get anyone. We – I was trying to make my immediate world a good place, just a little at a time.

But in the last few months, I see so much hypocrisy. People ignoring whatever doesn’t align with their world view. Attacking what they don’t understand. Pointing fingers and throwing barbs when they could just accept their own portion of responsibility in a situation. Selfishness taken to the extreme. And I feel like…people just suck. Grasping for themselves. Cheering for their side as though it isn’t real humans who are losing, sometimes their lives. Lying, Stealing, throwing temper tantrums when they don’t get their own way.

What happened to humanity? Please just tell me one beautiful, heart warming thing you have witnessed in the last, I don’t care how long….