Book Review: The Greatest Zombie Movie Ever

If I remember correctly I grabbed The Greatest Zombie Movie Ever by Jeff Strand at a Scholastic book fair for less than a dollar. The premise sounded funny. Three high school students set out to make the greatest zombie movie ever.

This book is hard to analyze. It frequently made me smile but never made me laugh – so not really a comedy. It was decently written. But it never bothered me to put the book down. I think it was 3 weeks before I finished it.

The ending really rubbed me wrong. Build, build, build, splat.  They failed to make a movie. Shocking. Totally couldn’t have seen that coming.

℘℘ – Two Pages. Completely forgettable but will occupy your time if you have nothing else to hand.

Book Review: Writer Mama

Sigh. If only I could rank this book based on the cover. It would absolutely be a six pager. This book arrived as a surprise. I opened the package to find a book I hadn’t ordered. Hrm. Inside the book was an inscription “I saw this and I thought of you. Much Love, M.”

Right there, this book is perfect. A human I love, loves me enough to think of me, buy a book, inscribe it, and then trek their ass all the way to the post office to mail it to me. I know something about that last one – I have multiple packages in my To Be Mailed pile.

Sadly, that is where the perfection of this book stops. It’s a how to get your start in writing for magazines, from 2007. Laughing.

I would love to say it had great nuggets of information that was applicable to all writers but …. no. She actually talks about including a SASE in your query letters. Ouch.

So how do you average so much love and good intention without lack of anything useful? LOL

Book Review: A Knit Before Dying

I simply can’t help myself, I see a cozy mystery and I have to pick it up. But give me credit, I often put them right back down before I even leave the library. A Knit Before Dying by Sadie Hartwell made it home with me though.

This is the second book in the series. I haven’t read the first. There were a lot of references to the first that I didn’t understand, so that was flow disruptive. Clearly, the main character, Josie, solved a murder in the last book but I have no idea who it was or who dun it. People are mad at her without any explanation, so I was left to assume their kin had something to do with the murder.

Josie was ok. Kind of bland. Actually that’s a good description for the whole book, bland. Josie solves two murders that are intertwined while running her Great Aunt’s yarn shop. It just didn’t evoke any emotion in me. Even the “big bad” scene was flat. And several times Josie refers to herself as Blair in her thoughts, before someone uses her whole name and you find out her last name is Blair. Which – double weird. Who refers to themselves by their last name in their own mind?

Why did I finish it? Well, I had it in my bag on a super busy week. And I never cared if I had to put the book down.  So it filled a lot of awkward time and it was vaguely entertaining. I did learn one thing though: Never put your name across the very top of your book because that’s where KCLS puts it’s bar code sticker and your name will be covered. LOL

℘℘℘ – 3 Pages. I finished it and it wasn’t offensive. Bland is the word of the day.

 

Book Review and Interview: The Seventh Seed

Every so often an author blesses me with an early copy of their latest book and then agrees to a short interview to amuse my readers. Tomorrow marks the launch of Allison Maruska‘s latest novel, The Seventh Seed.

Seed is the standalone sequel to The Fourth Descendant, and despite not having read it, I was not at all lost or confused. Nor was I drowning in back story. In fact, I was rather intrigued to read the previous book and learn more about the characters who have clearly been up to some interesting things.

Seed is a well done conspiracy book. The historian in me has no problem believing it’s coming. After all similar things have happened more than once before. I don’t want to give away too much. Let’s just say many people in Seed have taken to heart Margaret Mead’s famous quote, “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.” It makes for compelling reading. I quickly became invested in the welfare of the characters.

℘℘℘℘ – Four pages. Fun read with insidious ideas that linger.

The Seventh Seed ebook cover

A little about The Seventh Seed:
(Summary provided by author)

While researching beehive demise across the country, Javier stumbles onto a breakthrough – a virus carried by bugs that insecticides can’t eradicate. The discovery explains a string of human illnesses and deaths, and it means a vaccine is possible. But instead of his bosses celebrating his achievement, they try to kill him.

After evading capture, Javier meets Liz, a widow who works at a homeless shelter. Together, they become fugitives, and in searching for a vaccine, they discover an intricate chain of secrets that leads to the most powerful entities in the country.

To break the chain and free the people, Javier and Liz must fight an impossible battle. While winning means relief from decades of manipulation and oppression, losing would result in more deaths than the virus ever threatened. 

color head shot

So Allison, I have to say the future you paint in The Seventh Seed, is pretty scary. Being lied to with no choice but to pretend to go along or pay the price. That might top my list.  What story scares you?

 Of all stories? The Shining does the best job. The topiaries moving around was SUPER creepy.

Oh god. When I was in high school my boyfriend talked me into watching that with a bunch of our friends, now I never ever dabbled in horror before that movie, ever. That was my introduction. I think I almost peed my pants, twice. Ok, that was an over-share , clears throat, moving on.

Which word / phrase do you find yourself always over-using and having to edit out?

It’s a moving target. “For a moment” had a good run, but after I killed it there was too much throat clearing. Now there’s too much going on with eyes.

Clears throat. Sometimes you legitimately need to clear your throat a lot, like when you’ve just told your entire reading public you almost peed your pants watching The Shinning. LOL. Oh man, enough about me, let’s talk about you. If you could be any one of your favourite characters (your own or others you’ve read) for one day, who and why?

So I read a book a while back called His Majesty’s Dragon. It takes place during the Napoleonic Wars, only all of the armies have air forces comprised of dragons. The MC is Lawrence, and he unwittingly becomes the handler of a Chinese dragon that speaks eloquently and likes to be read to. I want to be Lawrence because he has a pet dragon, basically. Preferably on a day when they aren’t in battle.

 
Wow. Sounds like a very cool book. I’ll be sure to check that out, after I read the rest of yours of course. LOL. We’re about out of time here. Which means – cocktails! If you had a cocktail named after you, what would it be called and what would be in it? Would you drink it?

The Anxious Grammarian. LOL And probably not. I bet it tastes like advil and tears.

Um, no. I find it impossible to believe a woman who wants a dragon as a pet would have a boring cocktail. Let’s call it the Elegant Dragon. And I bet it tastes of Cinnamon tea and vodka. Bottoms up!

Grab a copy of The Seventh Sign and your favourite cocktail. Enjoy a Tuesday night, at least you aren’t taking on a corrupt government in your spare time.

Book Review: All Quiet on the Western Front

Anybody else have to read this in high school? God, I hated All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque. Yawn, yawn, so boring. Why do they torture us with this tripe?

Oh, the different 25 years makes.

I just reread All Quiet as I am teaching 20th Century World History this year at the coop and I am assigning it to my kids. It’s always good to pre-watch, pre-read, pre-whatever material before you show it to teenagers. LOL. Especially when you have complete control over what you expose them to. I try not to abuse that privilege.

Anyway, I loved this book this time. Seriously, the interactions between the humans. The book says it’s a war story but really, it’s the story of men and the brotherhood they form when under extreme pressure. The beauty of their relationships in a world that is stripped to the bare bones of life and death. You have only each other. I’m going to cry again just talking about the darn book. LOL

℘℘℘℘℘- Five pages. Incredible classic. If you remember it as a horrible book you were forced to read, give it another chance. It is an epic journey of men.

Book Review: I’m Traveling Alone

My friend K dropped this book at my house and said, “This is super creepy, I think you’ll like it.” LOL I love my friends.
I’m Traveling Alone by Samuel Bjork is an interesting read and definitely a bit of creepy going on. At least once I thought, no I don’t want to read this in bed, alone, at night, thank you very much.
Basic plot line, detectives track a nasty serial killer. A nasty serial killer who is playing games with them. And eventually targets them.
I liked the characters. I felt there was some interest in the team outside the two main detectives. The plot was, well, typical of detective stories. I did feel like the ending came a bit “poof-magic-all better now.” But at the same time, not everything was tied up. A couple of major plots points just hang in limbo.
My biggest complaint is regarding circular thinking. The author repeats phrases, demonstrating the circles a character, or five, are thinking in. But it’s not similar words on the same vein. It’s the exact same words, exact same sentences, 3 or 4 times on the same page. I eventually started scanning past those portions. I never considered abandoning the book though.
℘℘℘ – 3 pages, reasonably good entertainment. I’d read another book about this detective team if the author published one.

Book Review: Bird By Bird

I don’t remember who told me to read this. If you’re listening, thank you.

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamont was a delight.  It’s exactly the kind of writing book I love. Anne posits a theory, gives two or three examples backing it up, then makes her point and moves on. LOVE IT!

Fabulous Quotes:

Writing can be a pretty desperate endeavor, because it is about some of our deepest needs: our need to be visible, to be heard, our need to make sense of our lives, to wake up and grow and belong. It is no wonder if we sometimes tend to take ourselves perhaps a bit too seriously.

awareness is learning to keep yourself company. And then learn to be more compassionate company, as if you were somebody you are fond of and wish to encourage.

One line of dialogue that rings true reveals character in a way that pages of description can’t.

Plot grows out of character. If you focus on who the people in your story are, if you sit and write about two people you know and are getting to know better day by day, something is bound to happen.

℘℘℘℘℘ – Five Pages – I read it on the place home from Hawaii and loved every minute, even though the flight was late, the in flight entertainment system wasn’t working so the kiddo was a total pain, and I was still shaking that darn cold. Loved the book, even under those circumstances.

Book Review: Frozen in Time

The kiddo was at fencing camp. I was hiding in the back corner of the local, to the camp, library, working on editing and curic for next year. On one of my trips from the back corner to the bathroom a book caught my eye, Frozen in Time by Mitchell Zuckoff. I love me some WWII true story adventure. And this one did not disappoint.

Zuckoff weaves the tale of Greenland in WWII with the modern day hunt to bring home the last 2 unaccounted for Coast Guard service men. Greenland’s use during WWII is one of those little popularly known trivia answers. When you think WWII, you think Europe and Africa and East Asia. Most don’t even think that much, they think Pearl Harbor. LOL

But Greenland played a key roll. All those American planes that went to help in Europe, they had to be flown there by transport crews from America. The Atlantic is a big fat ocean. And we’re talking 1940s technology. They needed a place to pit. Several American bases were built there to aid in the transport. Lots of planes crashed there. Greenland is an inhospitable nightmare of snow, ice, and total white out conditions which come up in a nanosecond.  I did mention 1940s technology right?

I could tell you the story but then you wouldn’t read the book. LOL. In brief, a transport crashes. A search commences. One of the search planes crashes. Another search plane crashes and another and another. I lost track actually. Some of the men came home, some didn’t.

After a couple of previous attempts to locate one of the crashed rescue planes, in 2012 they try to succeed. Just read the book, it’s worth it. LOL

℘℘℘℘℘ – great writing, compelling tale. You can’t beat what really happened for characters that you can identify with and a plot that keeps you on the edge of your seat.

Book Review: Follow Me Back

I don’t remember why I got this. Someone somewhere mentioned it and I ordered it from the library. It took eons to get a copy, hence not remembering why I asked for it in the first place. LOL

Follow Me Back by A.V. Geiger was unexpectedly brilliant. I read it in one day. Read a bit in the morning while homeschooling the kiddo because I expected it to be crap and then I could add it to my one page reviews for third quarter and move on. Only, it didn’t quite go that way. I almost missed hot yoga I was so intrigued. Read during lunch. And then I took it to with me to get an oil change.

So why is this book so intriguing?

It is well written. No clunky dialogue. No misspelled words. No people talking that aren’t actually in the car.  No over inflated description. No head jumping. No time line confusion.

The main characters are compelling. I won’t go into details there because it would detract from the story.

The concept is one that plays on my mind frequently. Technology and just who is out there following you. It’s why I use a pseudonym. Why on some level I’m ok without a publishing contract. I’m ok with being indie. The spot light is not a place I want to be. I jokingly said to the hubs, “It’s hot and bright there.” And I like neither of those things.

The ending is where the book falters in my opinion. I think they want it to be a lady or the tiger type ending, where on some level you wonder if maybe she did really do that. For me, it just wasn’t there. I know firmly what happened. I’m being vague here because I don’t want to give it away.

℘℘℘℘℘ – Five Pages. If you like a strong psychological thriller, give this one a whirl.

Book Review: Modern Lovers

I’m not sure why exactly I picked this one up. It was on the Reader’s Pick shelves at the library. The cover is this really appealing green with yellow letters. Modern Lovers by Emma Straub. Her name was vaguely familiar. I had read something about her recently or read an interview with her maybe….

Told from multiple points of view, which is super fashionable right now, this book is…trendy. Book clubs, lesbian couples, the straight laced boy corrupted by the wild girl, the husband being duped, the couple that is only happy when things are in crisis. Nothing new or genre breaking. Maybe that’s why even though I laughed in places, I enjoyed reading it, it left no lasting taste in my mouth. I read it slowly over the course of 10 days. And I’m not sure if the kiddo hadn’t gotten sick I would have finished it at all. If I am reading a book slowly it is because nothing in it compels me, speaks to me. It all felt predictable. It was all tied up in a neat little bow at the end.

℘℘℘ – Three Pages. Perhaps I am just not the ideal audience for this book. I neither tired of my marriage nor have I abandoned my dreams.